mummy

mummy do you love me ?
in-spite of all he said....will you let me grow?

i can feel when you touch me , and tell me how you are.
and feel your pleasant whisper , though i cannot even hear.
i know you cried last night , when that man hit you hard
your tears felt salty , and had my senses blurred.

mommy when i grow up , i'll wash your pain away,
and take you to the garden u went the other day
mommy i shall buy you , new dresses that you want
but fear you cant afford them, from the meager money grant.

mommy when i grow up, we'll live in the seaside flat,
where you often dream of living , lying on our yellow mat.
mommy when i grow up , we'll have the biggest car,
you'll never have to worry of leaving me alone in fear.

mommy when i grow up , ill not want a dad
i know ill always hate him , for making you so sad
mommy when i grow up , we will have the best food
and ill make you a proud mommy , always feeling good.

mommy can you hear me, please don't let me die
i promise you be happy

third eye

i look myself in the mirror ,
my shame knows no bound.
everyday they come to room,
Sarita aunt never stops them.
i wish i could tell her,
how much it pains me.
how dirty i feel.

ma used to say its will be fine
when everyday she would comb my hair
before letting me out to play,
i would look back to see them entering her room
while she would close the door on my face.

i remember the men coming in palkis
to collect chaste soil from our courtyard
to make the idol ....
i wondered why our courtyard was so chaste
i found it rather dirty
stinking with smell of liquor, and dirty loin cloth

Sarita aunt always told me
we are the third eye
the third eye?
whose eye?
women from good families had them i guess
like the goddess durga

i keep looking at myself in the mirror
would i have a third eye,
would i? rather should i not?
i am no less pretty , no less loving ?
no less a mother than good women?

tonight i shall close my door,
and pray to Ma for my third eye
tonight i shall not succumb to them
tonight i want to know

if you made her out of my soil
would i not be her ?
if you closed you door to me
are you not defying her ?

i shall look into my mirror

tonight i shall find my third eye